N. Raghuraman's column: Money and sacrifice can never be weighed equally

Many years ago, I decided to give my parents' flat to my sister. When this was questioned, I said it was a sincere acknowledgement that it was the sister who took care of the father when he was seriously ill. Like most families, there were two types of siblings in our family – a 'satellite child', that is, a successful, distant sender. And the other 'Ken Child' – my sister – who took my father to the hospital several times and took care of him till the end. At the same time, his health also deteriorated, whose problems remain to this day. Earlier this week, I was reminded of this small part of my life when I had to go to a hospital in Mumbai where a member of my family was admitted. Another woman was admitted in a nearby room and her son was taking care of her. Sitting in the next room, I could hear the conversation between the son and his elder brother who lived abroad. From the conversation between the younger son and the mother, I could understand that the elder brother was sending the money and the younger brother was taking care of the mother's day-to-day needs. Once the younger brother angrily said on the phone that do not show that you sent money for this, send money for it. As soon as he noticed me, he took the phone and walked out. What I understood was that the eldest son was abroad and probably thought the bills were being paid because of me; Because of me, moms are eating well and being cared for; Things are being 'handled' because of me. The younger son was heard telling in different conversations that his mother forgets that he was present all the time during his hospitalization many times, but she always remembers that the elder son sends money for his care. Once they even bit him, but he could not leave them, because there was no one else to take care of him. When I went there one night this week, I heard the younger brother burst out and said in a loud voice, "Brother, I am thankful to you, because because of your money, I am able to get the best treatment for my mother." But you send money and sleep peacefully, even though I haven't slept a single night in the last four years. Your money can't clean their sheets at three in the morning, I do. As soon as he saw me coming out, he suddenly stopped. I went back inside to let him speak freely. He continued, "Brother, maybe you don't even know that I hurt my back while picking him up while bathing. The doctor told me that I had a herniated disc. But I can't take time for myself because he is in the hospital. You have no idea, brother. Remember that your money can't hold them when they're falling. Saying this, he hung up the phone. What a true thing he was saying! To this day, no one has heard that money can change diapers or support in loneliness. Maybe that's why I missed my sister. When I used to pay for my father's medicines, she used to feed him medicine. I may have borne the funeral expenses, but it was he who held my father's hand at the last moment. Then he called me and said, "Brother, I saw him leaving." I cursed myself that day. I was with him just two hours before he was discharged from the hospital, but in his last moments, this satellite successful child – that is, me – was not there. The trick is that inheritance does not mean equal distribution of wealth. It also means identifying who has made more sacrifices in their life so that someone else can improve their life. Money and sacrifice can never be weighed equally.